Week 3

I was sure the unexpected re-emergence of Dokken into pop culture last week foretold a Kirk Bell victory. He came close too, only two points behind, but along with Joe and Tim, he was held off by none other than Mrs. Commissioner, Kelly. Had a Swedish death metal band appeared in a commercial recently, then maybe I'd have predicted her win. Just kidding hon.

Going into the fourth weekend, the rookie Tim Mitchell (this happens all the time) is out front in the season-long race. As such, and per rule 1.77 sec A, Tim will be expected to produce a properly notarized birth certificate if he wishes to maintain his exalted position in the Friends of Smoove B football pool.

That's all for now.

Surprise Midweek Post

This can only mean one thing. Kirk is going to win Week Three. Those who know him know what I'm talking about.

There are some who call him...

Holla and props to Tim Mitchell, who, despite rampant upsetting upsets, eked out a 90 this weekend to take the Tuesday morning holy grail. I've known Tim for quite some time by way of softball, but this is his first appearance in the football pool. You may ask: Where has he been all this time?

Ordinarily I'd ask him for a bio, but I think that just about sums up his early adult life. Since then, I understand he's been LIVING in a VAN down by the RIVER.

Some of you may have noticed two records in the standings for my sister Amy. She's not double-dealing or anything; as you can see she's only playing one hand. Somehow a dupe got into the pool and I have not been able to fish it out just yet. Maybe I'll try to take care of that tonight. Or not.

But anyway, have a great week.

A Seismic Victory

I have to admit I haven't thought too much about football for a few days. Sarah Schneider, perhaps in some kind of cosmic alignment with the NFL team that makes its home in her town, erupted for 132 points and is the Week One champ.

You knew this, of course. Here's a picture of it happening:


I'm coming to you live from the volcanic island known as Maui, which should go a long way to explaining why the football pool finances have been about as far from my mind as the outcome of any random NBA game ever played. I know I have to make mention payouts this season, but I've been easily distracted. Here is a picture of some mangoes:


They're just unreal here. Crack addicts should be given this stuff when they're coming down.

Anyway, the numbers.

Total pool: 25 players @ 50 = 1250

Weekly prize: 50 x 17 weeks = 850

This leaves 400 to divide amongst the overall winners. I propose:
225 for first
125 for second
25 for third

The water here is just impossibly blue. I don't have a picture handy, sorry.

In addition to the above payouts, 25 will go to the person who gets picks in every week but finishes with the worst point total overall. We affectionately call this the Roo Award.

The financial page is here.

I'm sorry, that was a lie. Try this one.

For those of you who have sent in entry fees this past week, your payments will be reflected as soon as we pick up our coconuts, er, mail. Good luck to you in Week Two.

This Is The Week

Happy Labor Day everyone.

I'm not even sure who's all in the pool this year yet, but that's not unusual for the few days leading up to kickoff of the regular season.

For those in confidence pools like this one, this is probably the only week of pro football besides Thanksgiving where a Thursday night game is not unwelcome. So if you're in this year, let this be a reminder to get your picks in on Thursday by 5 p.m. CDT, latest. Thursday is 9/10...that being one day after, um, 9/09.

12

The Friends of Smoove B football pool rides again, now in its 12th season of laughter, tears, and made-up stories about your friends and family members who participate. This season promises to feature all kinds of interesting theater, whether it's Al Davis removing his teeth on camera or Dallas Cowboy tailbacks running headlong into the scoreboard at their new stadium, you'll read all about it here. Like it or not.

If you've been with us in prior seasons, you don’t need to do anything other than check your account at CBS Sportsline and update whatever needs updating. If you're new, the short version is this: you buy into the league for $50. Your $50 entry is good for the season. Every week you assign a confidence value to each game being played, putting 16 on the game your most sure of and counting down from there to 1 (3 or 4 once the bye weeks start).

Weekly payouts of $50 for first and a to-be-determined amount for second will be the rule as usual; season-long payouts are determined by the number of participants, but usually, the top three spots pay out something. Yours truly keeps nothing (unless I win a week, but that never happens anyway).

As for where to go with entry fees, my address is unchanged, but if you need it again, just send me an email or message on Facebook and I'll get it to you. Or I might see you in person. In fact, I might be watching right n...nevermind.

The season starts Thursday September 10th at 7:30 pm central time. Picks are due two hours prior to the first game each week (and for several weekends this fall, I will likely be unavailable to accomodate those who miss the deadline).

"Chili, I can't wait to be your boss, I mean, play for you."

Okay, that'll do.