Roomeo and Juliet

I picked up the phone last Thursday evening.

"Hello?"

The voice on the other end was unmistakably Reuther. But what was he saying? He intoned:

What light through yonder television breaks?
'Tis the Saints, and Indianapolis of the AFC East!
Arise, sons of Lambeau, with slings and arrows and max protect
In three hours' time vanquish the memory of 4th and 26
Behold the vestal livery of the green and the gold
Cast aside thy doubt that our quarterback is too old
Bring forth the pundits, the seers, and the fools
Who dare make predictions and tell secrets of cover two
And who is this Julius? Tis Caesar? Or Jones?
It matters not, my friend
Football is back, and I must get off the phone

I don't know that I've ever heard Roo quite so happy. So enthralled was I by his rhapsodic musings that I almost didn't have the heart to point out the flaw in his soliloquy. But that, of course, passed.

Dude! Indianapolis is in the AFC South.

Still, he was right. It's good to have football back, the trials imposed on us by the CBS Sports website notwithstanding. Before I get too far, I'd like to welcome back Team Lanning after a one year hiatus. Also say hello to new members Chris Graff and Angela Novotney. Mandatory bios will come at a later date, but I will at this time caution everyone that Chris is a Bears fan. I think that's him, third from left. I could be wrong.

Nice job, Jerry Znidorka (that's J-Z to you), right out of the gates. He gets first place in the first week. Interesting. Last season, Jerry placed dead last in week one. First place, as usual, will be worth fifty bucks each week this season. Second place each week is worth $20, and in week one, this spiffy little prize goes to Brother Jim, who owns the tiebreaker over Nadine/Joe.

Now then, this season's math:

32 players @ 50 apiece = 1600.

Weekly payout:
50 x 17 weeks = 850 for first place
20 x 17 weeks = 340 for second

For a total of 1190. This leaves 410 to divide amongst the overall winners.
175 for first
135 for second
75 for third

The last 25, you may remember, will go to the bottom-feeder, that is, the person with the worst point total who - and this is important - does his or her picks every week.

As usual, I will for the most part pay out all winnings at the end of the season, which saves me a lot of check writing. Exceptions are gladly made upon request, or if I see you and happen to have the cash on me.

More later.